I just drank the dreggs of the company coffee! i have no idea how long it was in that heated pot! but it is thick and a creamy thing did not change the color of 6 oz of it!!! GULP!!!!! I FEEL AS IF I COULD FLY. when i get home after work, I am going to fly on over to the Welsh Farms to get me a quart of skim milk! THE MILK COINOSSEUR'S NUMBER #1 CHOICE!!!!! "hmm...yes...this mixture of corn and grass and wheat byproducts has coagulated deliciously in Bertha the Cow's mammary glands!" I imagine a be-mustouched man swirling around a bit of milk in a red wine glass. or brandy snifter! in my perfect world, i would drink everything out of a brandy snifter. EVEN PEE, IF YOU GAVE ME MONEY!!


this weekend, misha will be coming to my house to 'molest my cat'. you should be aware that the only reason he wants to come to my house is little adorable petting-whore gracie, and he has admitted this. i plan on locking him in my closet for a few weeks, where his only company will be my sister's old Elvis lamp and a large dustbunny named Patsy.

I tried making impromptu Kim-Chi last night but it tasted too salty. I GOT THIS RECIPE FROM BUST THE OTHER DAY, WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME THAT THEY WERE BACK IN BUSINESS?? I had to take the train home the other night (well actually, walk to bus, train, train, almost cab ride home [but ran into friend with car on train]), and as i was waiting for it and reading BUST, an older gent sat next to me and struck up a conversation. he said "I just saw the title of your magazine..I have to ask you...that isn't the meaning of that word that i think it is, is it?" I assured him that I was not publicly reading pornography and he told me that he thought so, I seemed too classy to be reading porno. He was a semi-drunken truck driver from Rahway and I overheard him use the word 'galvanized' in his conversation with a friend. I am constantly impressed and delighted with humanity. (it reminds me of my sister's story in new orleans, when late at night on the trolley, a gruff drunken dirty man who she had previously been afraid of turned to her and said "you look like an urbane young woman" and asked her to settle a bar bet about the meaning of a word. I DONT REMEMBER WHAT WORD THO!!!!! SADDY FACE ALERT!!!! :( :( :( wow)

Gracie rushes to meet me when i come home every day, like a befurred housewife. i just wish she also did the dishes and gave me a nightly backrub!! :(

where is a good place to go to study furniture design? or do i have to apprentice somewhere? or should i just start making it, and install little video cameras on each piece, so that they will record when people sit on my chairs and the chairs break and then i can have a good laugh! why is it that i find people breaking chairs and falling really funny?