I'm the same as I was when I was 6 years old


Erika loves the part in the Modest Mouse song when it goes "And the plants and the animals, they are land, and the plants and the animals eat each other". She says it makes her think of a fern swallowing a donkey. A fern and a donkey! SHe makes a sound effect when she talks about this, it goes "SCHLOOOOP!" Once she made a Prince CD fly through the air, and its sound effect was all "AYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAH!"

I meant to write an entry before this, because all the stuff I want to talk about mounts up, and then I get a headache when I try to think of it all and phrase it right and transfer it into cyberspace junk!!

THis is a good transition into some other stuff. I contemplated the existence of Junkyard Dog this weekend, and how I hadn't thought about him for a long time.

On Friday I went to the first wedding of one of my own friends. Maybe I will have some reflections about it eventually, but to tell you the truth I don't remember the event that much. I remember the drunken mother of the bride petting my head and inviting me to dance, and my TAG teacher from the 3rd grade talking about snakes. And my mom spilling red wine all over me. But that is about it. All I could think about was how these two people standing in front of me, in front of the minister, were definitely going to get funkay that night. Is this normal? ERika used to tell me how she imagined her professors gettin it on with their spouses all the time. If I did that, I don't think I could live.

Then I went and visited my sickened sister. We watched lots of movies. Emily came up with a special catchphrase: "THERE AIN'T NO SUCH THING AS HONOR WHEN IT COMES TO PUSSY." Also a funny thing was we were talking about sympathy sex gone awry. Sympathy sex from the oblivious. "Oh, you look sad. How about a dick in your mouth?" I don't think these things are as hilarious as they were that night. A realy funny thing was when Emily stuck her bare foot on Vinny's face in a sudden mean gesture. I think her toe went up his nose. She was all "SMELLLLL MY FFEEET!!!!" I love Emily.

Also a funny Emily thing she told me about was when her bisexual coworker Greg was all complaining "I am only sexually attracted to black men, but I only meet women or white guys who I can be emotionally attracted to." So Emily tells him, "Why don't you find a really ugly masculine black women and date her then?" SMART ADVICE FROM THE BEST IN THE WORLD!!!

THis is a really lame entry tonight. I am feeling lame.

Fark it. I am ending this for sleep. I bet after that truly inspired entry, all my entries will be as crappy as this.